peachypenguin12

Mon, 16 May 2005 22:45:10 GMT

so i'm working 2 jobs this summer. one at cinemark and the other as a waitress at golden corral. wish me luck!!!

Tue, 18 Jan 2005 06:28:21 GMT

why do i like ben oh so much? because he's absolutely fabulous. and oh gosh!!! but i don't know how he feels about me. i want him to want me but yeah i don't know if he does. i'm too afraid to ask him because i'm afraid of what the answer will be.

Sun, 12 Dec 2004 21:40:13 GMT

Good Luck on finals everyone!!!!!

the fatty club

Wed, 01 Dec 2004 22:19:30 GMT

so nat made a new club and the fatty club and i'm joining it too. anyone else who wants to join must eat the last piece of cake. doens't matter who's cake it is or where you eat the cake but it has to be the last piece of cake.

jayme
v-pres. of the fatty club!

Tue, 23 Nov 2004 18:25:41 GMT

this is to anna but since you weren't home i had to copy and paste what i wanted to send you in this. i just needed to vent!!!!!

so i totally know you're not there but i really need to vent!!!!!! so i'm so fucking pissed at jaci right now. for a plethora of reasons!!!! to start. yesterday we decided to celebrate nat's b-day because it's this thursday and obviously nobody will be here to do so. so it took us forever to figure out where we wanted to go out and eat. the whole time emily and jaci are like we're not hungry. and jaci was pissed because the shit she wanted on e-bay wasn't available. so after nat finally picks a place that is cheap and close by we all go. well jaci and emily don't order anything at all. instead they sit down at the table and look at nat and i like we're inconviencing them. and it was obvious that nat was upset because we were all supposed to go out and eat together because it was her b-day dinner. all jaci did was complain about how much homework she had to do which is bullshit because all she did when we got home was jump online and start talking to zack and then talked to him on the phone. anyway so we come back to the room and do cake and presents and the whole time jaci complained about how messy mine and nat's room is. yes it's messy but it's not your fucking room so shut the fuck up!!!! anytime she comes over here she complains about the room. it's not my fault she's anal retentive about her room and everything has it's place. whatever. so nat and i start talking later on last night about her b-day dinner. and i tell her that jaci was complaining because nat's b-day was an inconvience. it pisses me off because for emily's b-day we went all out!! we decorated the room and everything and nat was sick that day like physically ill and she still went out and ate dinner and didn't complain a single time! and for her b-day jaci and emily couldn't muster enough enthusiasm at all. and then come to find out that jaci is only talking to me because she feels she has to. nat said that jaci said that she has to talk to me because she doens't want me to be all alone next semester over here in my room. (nat's going to australia) and that jaci said she really has no reason to come over to my room next semester at all. you know what i have to say....fuck her!!!! i don't talk to her because quite frankly i don't like her and have nothing to say to her because she's such a bitch!!!! and anytime we do talk it ends up with us arguing and i just don't care enough anymore. she's so quick to tell everyone what's wrong with them but god forbid anyone say anything to her. i have nothing to say to her at all. i don't care if we ever speak again!!! as far as i'm concerned we're not friends and i don't know her!!!!

Sun, 21 Nov 2004 19:09:04 GMT

hmmmm.....relationships!

hmm

Fri, 05 Nov 2004 04:11:09 GMT

i'm lonely. i just want someone and the someone i want doesn't want me. why? i'm lonely. i'm finding it hard to be his friend. why can't i be his friend? why can't pepole be friends with that they like in more than friends way? why is that difficult? is it because it sucks to know you can't have them at this point? or is it because no matter how hard you try something always gets in the way and screws things up?

emotionally unavailable guys

Thu, 28 Oct 2004 05:55:24 GMT

why is it that i always seem to find the guys who are emotionally unavailable? like seriously, is there a club of them out there and when i come along they send one out knowing that i'll take them? i say this because there's this guy who i was dating for not long at all. everything was going great, he's the one who initiated everything; dating, wanting to be together for a long time and blah blah blah. anyway out of the blue after seeing me 3 hours before he decides that he's just not ready for whatever and that he needs to straighten out his life and blamed work and school. this wouldn't be a big deal except this seems to be a pattern in his relationships. here is my theory. yes i'm a psych major so i tend to overanalyze a lot but my theory makes some sense. he's had a hard life, without going into specifics, he's been on his own for years. he's been dependent on himself to get by. he's been working since he was young and is putting himself through college. so for years he's had to trust in himself and be dependent upon himself. and doesn't know how to trust in others that they won't up and leave. and he had a 3 year relationship where the girl cheated on him and they did the on-off again stuff (that i'm so famous for myself) anyway. none of his relationships or flings whatever you want to call them have worked out since then. he always breaks up with them after a few weeks blaming his schedule. this may seem normal except wouldn't someone realize that after countless flings one should hold off on relationships until they have the time? but he is a repeat offender when it comes to this and i think it's because after a few weeks of dating someone, the people usually realize that they want to continue it and really start to open up. but he never seems to get that far. my theory is that he doesn't know how to trust and depend on others. he's used to doing it on his own and when he feels himself start to open up he immediately pulls away and pushes the other person away. it's obvious that we both really like each other and want to see where this relationship could go except yet again he's blaming his schedule for not being together. some of you may be thinking well maybe he fools himself into thinking he's ready when that's not it. because, knowing, his track record i asked him if he would have the time to devote to "us" and he with absolute certainity that yes he would make the time because he genuinely cares for me and knows that we would have something good. so again in comes my theory. he doesn't know how to open up and when he feels himself start to he pulls away.
why is that i fall for the emotionally unavailable guys? it's not like i seek them out or ask every guy i come into contact with "are you emotionally unavailable..oh you are..ok..then yes please date me". no not at all they just seem to find me. but this sucks because i really like this guy and i'm fairly confident that we could work out if we gave it the chance. the only problem is...you can't make someone who is emotionally unavailable ready for something, especially when they can't/won't open up. but i really want to see where it goes.
love till later,
jayme

newness

Wed, 20 Oct 2004 15:29:15 GMT

so, i'm dating justin. we met last year through a friend and decided to start dating a few days ago. i say we're dating because he called me his girlfriend the other day when he was telling his friend about us. last night, i stayed over. no...for all of you who are thinking along those lines..that did not happen. all we did was makeout and cuddle and ended up falling asleep. it was nice!!! it's funny how something new just makes you feel good.

gota love mondays

Mon, 04 Oct 2004 20:02:56 GMT

life may not be the party we hoped for but while you're here you might as well dance.

Sat, 25 Sep 2004 02:10:38 GMT

there everyone, i finally got a live journal.